How to put myself first?
These past few hours a small thing (maybe something that looks not important) keep follow me, it feel heavy inside me, like a shadow i cannot leave, the more i try to forget, the more it press me. This is about the sadness of being misunderstood, the pain when someone think bad of me, when someone judge me low, while me.. i never (not even one second) think bad about him. Behind all of this i was preparing something maybe simple (but for me it is big) a small surprise. that i build by saving money for months, by stopping myself from buying things, by holding my own wishes, only to make a holiday together with this person, a happiness i thought we can share :( But how can i explain this hurt, when what he see in me is only suspicion, that i do everything just for myself but it is not true at all. At the end the truth hit me that we are not equal ; he look down on me while i put him too high, too high like i worship him. I feel angry and i feel disappoi...
